Dodging Energy Vampires

Dodging Energy Vampires: An Empath’s Guide to Evading Relationships That Drain You and Restoring Your Health and Power by Christiane Northrup

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What is an energy vampire?

Energy vampires are people who exhibit some personality disorder.  Energy vampires are people who… sometimes intentionally drain your emotional energy. They feed on your willingness to listen and care for them, leaving you exhausted and overwhelmed. Energy vampires can be anywhere or anyone.  They draw you into a conversation that leaves you feeling exhausted. 

Energy Vampires & Anger

Energy vampires can significantly disrupt the lives of the people who care about them. This can leave you feeling exhausted and Angry. This article – How Successful People Deal With Energy Vampires does a great job illustrating some examples of different types of energy vampires in the workplace.

Video on how to deal with Energy Vampires

Check out this video on how to deal with energy vampires. Skip to 8:28 in the video if you want to get straight to how you can protect yourself from energy vampires. The entire video is really interesting therefore I recommend watching the whole thing when you have more time.

What should I do about this?

  1. Rid yourself of vampires. You need to be rid of that person before you can heal.
  2. Set limits. If you can’t cut a vampire out of your life, learn to set limits. After spending a little time with you (sometimes just 20-30 minutes), an energy vampire will begin to reach their capacity. You’ll know this energy vampire is maxed-out on your positive energy when they start turning negative. They’ll start criticizing you, getting on your case—basically, their inner monster will rear its head. So, you can set limits for the amount of time you spend with energy vampires.
  3. Release shame. Many empaths who are in relationships with energy vampires were often shamed during childhood. Shame is toxic and actually produces the inflammatory chemical known as IL-6. Many empaths hold onto shame from childhood. Being highly sensitive it may not even take a major psychological stressor, such as an energy-vampire-relationship, to trigger health issues.
  4. Put your emotional needs first.  Putting yourself and your needs first is the equivalent of going on the offensive. Treat yourself with the same care and love that you treat others. You may need to start with baby steps such as deleting someone from your social media. You can also practice saying “no” when someone asks you to do something that you don’t want to do. Practice saying, “I simply can’t.” Or, “That is not possible.” Over time, you’ll get good at it and become adept at setting healthy boundaries. Also, you need to pat yourself on the back often. When you are in control of your own life and your relationships, energy vampires and other predators will feel your light and will run the other way!
  5. Stop giving love to a bottomless pit. Real, healthy love is toxic to energy vampires. There is only so much love a vampire can handle before they become nasty and angry. Knowing this, you can stop giving your love to a bottomless pit. Energy vampires will never be able to reciprocate or even receive your love and affection. Instead, it will only make them more toxic, more aggressive, and more negative.
  6. Don’t compromise. No energy vampire likes boundary setting. Learn to be okay with this. You don’t need them to like that you’re done with the interaction. Learn to say “Okay, I gotta go,” and then leave. Let them throw their fit, if they must, but don’t get involved. Stick to your guns, get moving, and don’t look back.
  7. Focus on something other than your relationship. If you must spend a little one-on-one time with the energy vampire in your life, choose activities that take the focus off your relationship. Find shared passions and do those together. Perhaps you both love art. So, meet them at an art show where the focus is on the art—not on your relationship. Once the pressure is off, the energy vampire is less likely to focus their negative energy on you, making the experience lighter all around.
  8. Accept Them. Know who you’re dealing with and give up the dream that they’ll ever be any different. There’s a lot of freedom (and peace) in that kind of acceptance.

Give this book a try today! Please leave me your comments below if you have an energy vampire in your life maybe at home, school, or work. I would love to hear your thoughts on how energy vampires suck your energy and what you do about it in your day to day life.

Free printable PDF sent right to your email. Print this out and put it up on your fridge or on your desk at work. When you know better you do better.

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